Last Sunday I danced my last Qoya offering for the year which explored the theme Freedom of Choose.

Whilst my mind could easily grasp the concept that “of course”  I have “freedom of choose” I have been blessed with the time I have been born, the family I was born into, the skin colour, the country, the socio economic systems etc, I have been born into a whole lot of privilege that allows my mind to recognise that I really do have the freedom to choose – however through the movement it has lead to a deeper reflection on the idea of yes we can choose but what is it we actually believe we have to choose from.

Are we truly free to choose or are we just picking off the pick list that our culture, our perceived external expectations, our education and or our entrenched values systems seem to offer us?

Whilst we truly do have freedom to choose do we really allow ourselves to choose from our fullest potential or really are we only choosing from our limited space of awareness.

When we do choose what are the defining characteristics of the choice we make?

Do we allow for the greatest examination of all possibilities?

How could we even allow our limited minds to understand what all the possibilities are for us?

And what we do know now, will only be part of what we know in the future and therefore what are our guiding principles for exercising our freedom to choose, in this moment?

If you are about to make a choice, what options do you allow yourself to have?

Do you consider the option to flex and change and grow or the options to do things just for joy or to test stuff out because we have a hunch or to let ourselves fail so we can just learn instead of reaching a goal?

Do you even consider the choice of letting go of all expectations and choosing something others are not or never have?

Honestly all the questions that arose from moving with my freedom to choose, created a sense of foreboding within me. A sense of overwhelm, and the thoughts of “stop with the questioning – because you’re going to get it wrong!

With limited freedom, it would seem life could be more simple. So it bought up another question – Do you shelter yourself from the true potentiality so that you don’t have to actually own your sense of freedom and choices?

For with the true sense of freedom of choice also becomes the ownership and accountability of what happens next, and often this sense of potential creates great uncertainty. With our ego minds constantly try to keep us safe, it will love the out clause of blaming others, and making us feel victimised by our own choices. So by minimising our choices down to a limited amount of options, the safer options , the ones that don’t threaten it or threaten the status quo, it slowly slowly diminishes our awareness and as a result our sense of freedom.

So how do we allow for our awareness to expand, so that we truly do understand the choices we have? And what if we make a choice and it doesn’t turn our as planned? Then what?

Well from our new found place of awareness; We recognise our freedom and we choose again.

Is it not better to choose truly for our sense of potential and fail than to only give ourselves options ABC because that’ what our ego projects is safe and therefore we in this moment only perceive to be “right”?

I have for my life believed I have the freedom to choose but slowly I’m recognising we only have the freedom to choose within our current level of consciousness or awareness. And our consciousness and awareness will only grow if we choose the options that sit on the perimeter of these edges. The choices that feel the most edge pushing and the most turned on in our bodies. The choices, that actually step us up and out of our current levels of living. The freedom comes in the ability to make our minds “not safe”.

If we believe we are broken, if we believe we must do as we are told, if we believe we have to be good, if we believe we are not enough, if we believe we must do <insert your own belief in here> to be successful, then really all we are doing is constantly making ourselves smaller and trapping ourselves in limiting our freedoms.

So wherever you are currently at and if you are beginning to make some choices about what your 2020 will look like for you, just allow yourself to come into the present moment and notice any fears, thoughts or beliefs and just begin to expand your sense of awareness around them. Dig up your current sense of centre and begin to get a little curious and a little challenging. Explore what your current awareness range is – and start to push the boundaries about what else could be true or truer for you. Why only give yourself a life fuelled by the choices of meat and 3 vegetables when the combinations are limitless?!

And just keep in mind, that the true power of the freedom to choose is knowing that you can do it again and again.

With Love

Nicola xx